Coming Soon to Everywhere, Grade Inflation. Where does it end?
MoneySuck#2 got back from the Sanduski Golden Helmet Basketball & Shower Camp last week, unscathed as far as I know since I did not see any tears in his chainmail underwear. Being the 1st sports camp we sent him too, I did not realize that you get a report card. I thought, awesome, he will now have something to do such as improving his game over the summer since surely the report card will indicate a multitude of way he can improve. This alone will cut down the times he says “I’m Bored” to fewer than 1,000. Then I saw the report card (see below). I’m not sure based on his grades what he needs to work on? MoneySuck#2 is a decent player but really, all A’s with the worst grade being an A-. Why bother with page 2 “Individual Improvement Plan” of the report card if he has nothing that needs improvement. Do you think in Navy Seal training they hand the guys a report card after a few day of training with something like this so as to encourage the fellas on? Man, I hope not otherwise we might be in trouble.
I did not say anything directly to him. Hell no, perish the thought I actually use what my Dad used to call “Constructive Criticism” thus hurting his feelings and ruining his life. I took, Parenting 101, and know how to make the easy decisions for me and avoid confrontation before a 2 hour ride home. Even knowing it’s detrimental to my kid’s social development,it’s just another of the many hard decisions I make every day to make my life easier. This situation brings up the following thoughts and questions about grade inflation.
You don’t have to be Colombo or Ani Bezzerides (yeah, I don’t know who the last one is either but I threw it in here for the young bloods who might actually read something rather than watch it on a video) to know this is another case of grade inflation but now it’s even entered into the sports camp grading world. In my kids schools it seems a majority (not mine) of the kids get straight A’s all the time. Really? Not many kids that get B’s, C’s and forbid the day a teacher actually gives a D or F to some stupid kid and then tells their parents their kid is dumb! Just look at my Donkey of the Weeks, there is a shit load of stupid morons out there so let’s identify them early so we can either help them or start a population control program. In all my kids’ years in the school, I’ve never seen or heard of a kid getting a D or F. In fact, I have not seen D’s or F’s since I got those grade back at my grammar school, at the esteemed Father Mulsoff Industrial School for Incorrigible Kid’s. When you received those grades, your Father was thrilled that now he could use that wonderful Father Day gift you got him, a belt, for more than holding up his pants. What a waste that in today’s world the belt is only being used for only one thing and thus robbing our Dad’s out of releasing their pent up anger at the world.
So where does it end? I’m not sure, since it’s in the best interest of the schools and the teachers to inflate the grades of their students. When they do that the administrators appear to be brilliant, the school looks like the fast track to Harvard, the teachers appear to be wonderful at their jobs and they all can brag about how they have elevated average kids to brilliant students. There is no motivation for doing anything else. Just pump up the grades and send them along with the false sense that most of them are Valedictorian candidates and never fail. All that works great until they get into the real world that’s not test/report card driven. Add this to the fact that they are most likely already bubble wrapped by their parents and watch the shit (some use the term Millennials) hit the fan. When that goes down, I hope we have enough counselors available to talk them down from the ledge and let them know, everything is going to be alright, maybe. If not, head to the fallout shelter, you don't want them landing on you.