Trench Coach


While I was watching my kid play baseball this week at the Park, I noticed a guy coaching 3rd base on the other field.  My eyes are not the best but I believe it was a parent?  You will notice that he is not wearing your traditional coaching gear. 

Through some thorough research, I found out this unique uniform is due to the fact that he just graduated with high honors from the Jumpin Jack Flasher Coaching academy.  Similar to being a valedictorian, he has won the “Creepo Charlie” award.  This award is limited to coaches of 7 & 8-year-old boys since any kids older than that are just too fast.  What was really unusual is that this man does not even have a kid on this team thus showing his passion for the sport.  He’s a real go-getter in the coaching world. I also thought it odd that with such accreditation he would be a head coach and not a 3rd base coach.  However, I soon figured out the pure genius of the Coaching Academy.  What better way (besides having a priest or Boy Scout leader at that position) to get the kids to run faster as they are being waived home than by the site of a stranger in a trench coat!  See picture 2 as a real life example of this as the kids scurry off the field.  I heard many parents encouraging their kids as they rounded 2nd base, “Run Johnny, Run for your life! 

Notice his hands never "come" out of his pockets.

Notice his hands never "come" out of his pockets.

In the course of my research, I also found out that this award is no stranger danger to his family.  The family is prolific in this area of expertise with several of his family members having previously won the award.  See attached pictures taken from the wall of fame via a database of the Academy.  It would be wise of you to study them closely so you can recognize them on the street.  Congratulations Mr. Man on continuing the excellence in coaching that is a family tradition. 



It’s All About Me, Me, Me, Me, Me.  Who the heck is the Bob behind and do you really want to know?  Anyway………

My name is Bob and I’ve been told I joke too much.  The naming of my website came from my trip to Nepal when after the first couple of days trekking to the Mt. Everest Base Camp our Sherpa Guide, Limbu, confided in my friend the following; “Bob is a nice guy but Bob Joke Too Much”.  Once he started to understand and/or tolerate my sarcasm (maybe 21 days in) we became good friends and supporters of his guide business.  So it all worked out but now my friend tends to remind me of that quote when I go too far with my satirical humor.

Anyway......I was born a poor black child of a sharecropper on the front porch of my home in the Mississippi Delta.  Not buying that?  OK, just a middle class, blue collar kid in an all-white, Irish Catholic neighborhood boarding the Southwest side of Chicago.  One of seven children raised by a normal Mom and Dad who obviously believed the Catholic Church recommendation of the Rhythm Method as an effective form of contraception.  My Wife, two boys and I live in Chicago.

Observing and experiencing life since 1963.  I have been extensively educated at Father Mulsoff Industrial School for Incorrigible Kid’s, Brother Duffin High School for Vulnerable Boys and The Institute for Applied Nonsense.  Note that even though the 1st two schools had known molesters as “teachers”, I was never once approached for molestation in spite of the fact that I was very susceptible, small, skinny and weak boy.  Due to current litigation against the Catholic Church for discrimination, that’s all I can say on the subject.

I have no qualifications for being a writer.  However, this will not stop me from publishing many of the yearly 17,000 thoughts that pop into my mind on the website and anywhere else. I will cover topics including parenting, gun control, donkeys, idiots, politics, religion, racism and any other controversial subjects I find worthy in an attempt of provoking laughs, stimulating deep thinking and/or just pissing off the politically correct with my satirical prose.  My thoughts and opinions will appear on my website and all other social media outlets no matter how much a waste of time until I die.